People usually talk about their successes. But what if you are like me and you don't have a lot? It is really sad when my ultimate best someone's mediocre work. For example, I have a friend who used to make me feel so inferior of myself. So much that now I am not even happy when I did well on an exam. I would be like "I could have done better".
The real question is why am I even friends with people like that?
I seriously don't know. It is like this picture.
haha. i am so silly. this picture is totally irrelevant.
Lately I have been noticing a positive change in my personality. I am less emotional, I don't take things seriously, and I am generally happier. Compare to how I was in the fall, winter, and spring. I am proud myself for working so hard to built self confidence and esteem. Did i force myself to be happier? Not really. I just learn to accept things as they are and learn to live for myself and by myself.
Well there is one thing that haven't changed about me.
I am not good with separation. Based on my highschool experiences, when we all left for college we left each other. My friends in highschool became pictures and fb messages. What happen to "keep in touch" or "see you in the summer". I have to admit that I didn't try either. The same thing will happen once we graduate college, we will leave this bubble and each other lives. From highschool I have maibro who is not even a friend since he is a bother. I don't know who I will have left once college is done for good. I have grown to accept that people will separate and disappear. Maybe that is why I am hesitant to form close friendships with people. It is better to keep things superficial so all we have left are random facts that doesn't define who we are? Or it is better to create vignettes so one day we can say "I wonder what he/she is doing now":)
well time to do hw and sleep. peace out!
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